Spanish
Watching an episode of Sex and the City, a phrase strongly captivated my attention and lingered in my head all day: "When the relationship starts with sex, it's destined to be just sex".
"Secret sex" is not only the title of that episode, but also the name of songs, books, and a topic that has even been explored since ancient times. Aristotle wrote about unknown sexuality. But, beyond art and philosophy, Is this type of interaction really healthy?.
In a world where individual autonomy and privacy take center stage, this phenomenon, although taboo for some, responds to specific needs and lifestyles.
"No strings attached" or "secret" relationships have gained ground, especially among generations that reject traditional structures. It's sex without attachment, without promises, and without exposure. But, how can we distinguish a purely sexual connection from an emotional relationship?
Some of the actions that, we could say, show that it is only sexual and not affective:
- He doesn't introduce you to his friends.
- He doesn't talk about a future together.
- He doesn't get involved with your activities or plans.
- You don't go out together or you only go out to places with low or no confluence of people.
- He doesn't introduce you to his family.
- He avoids commitment.
- He avoids attachment and emotions.
If we look at the figures:
In the country, divorces are on the rise. In 2023, 47,027 marriages and 25,914 divorces were recorded. This suggests that more than half of the unions could end in separation.
What does this tell me? That we are facing generations that prefer not to have long-term commitments.
Are there benefits to having secret relationships? Of course. Among them:
- Low or no emotional maintenance: no involvement, no need to be aware or attentive to that person. They are casual.
- Serves as a physical outlet for needs.
- Allows you the freedom to flirt with other people.
- There are no dates to the cinema or restaurants, no trips inland, no money is spent on joint activities.
- Sexual desires that have been previously repressed can be explored.
- Avoid emotional stress.
Secret and emotionless sex is a practice that exists and will continue to exist in different forms, whether it's a "hidden relationship by choice or infidelity". It is neither good nor bad, it has nothing to do with ethics or morals, but mutual consent and the consequences it may have must be taken into account.
As with any intimate decision, the important thing is that it be made with responsibility, honesty, and full knowledge of its possible effects. Use protection and be careful!
